Every year, we near closer to another birthday, another milestone in our lives. As we grow older, it’s difficult to not find yourself sitting there, reflecting upon the year that has just passed you by. Pondering over what you have lost and gained, what you have accomplished and forgotten, where you are and where you’ve been, you will most likely find yourself realizing who is still and no longer in your life.
It is inevitable that things will change, people will come and go and you will always keep moving forward. Everything in between, is it all worth it? Do we ever get a second or even third chance at the events that changed us so deeply? If you have encountered a year, full of love and heartbreak, then this will be the question of the day. After a heartbreak, comes the grief, anger and displacement. When that begins to slowly fade though, comes the enlightenment. I’m sure all of us would go back and change certain things if we could, but when looking at life objectively, there are no mistakes.
Perhaps it is not about getting a second or third chance at the events that moved you, but rather doing it better the second or third time around, in your new era of time. A heartbreak teaches you more about your inner demons, which need to be awakened at some point in all of us. When accepting and understanding these, we become enlightened, leading us forward in a new ray of light, creating a better circumstance, organically, in the next relationship or place in our lives. Naturally, gaining more knowledge about ourselves allows us to prosper and feel more comfortable in our own skin, especially when realizing that there are no mistakes, only choices. This is the universal design to help consistently push you forward. When feeling satisfied with who we are in our lives, we give ourselves the opportunity to open up to new people, places and events. These experiences will be new moments in time, creating new lessons and abilities to push ourselves forward.
Breaking someone’s heart is one of the hardest things to come to terms with, and it should be a heavy enough feeling to know you’d never do it again, to the same person anyhow. However, having your heart broken can almost be a more detrimental feeling, especially when it occurs repeatedly, by the same person. Like an amusement park ride, you never know when you’re going to land; something like this will change you in a way that nothing else can. Numerous questions will drive you insane. How could someone do this so many times? When did I become so insecure? Why am I still not good enough? What kind of human makes so many unkempt promises? Questions like these will cycle through you for months to come. However, as you begin to repeat them, without ever really having an answer, you begin to feel a sense of comfort and strength, knowing that life doesn’t always present an answer.
This is when the enlightenment begins, as you rid of all resentment and anger, knowing that what you deserve is much more than having to question yourself on a daily basis. For whatever reason at this moment in time, this person cannot give you what you need, or perhaps even what they need. This has no barring on you, as you know you are a strong, competent, capable human being. This slashing of the heart will give you a protective guard; this won’t be the kind of guard that makes you weak and timid. This new guard will be fierce, blunt, honest and ready for anything that life throws its way. You will open up even more to new opportunities, people and aspects of life. You will feel more alive than ever because you have already survived a death, that moment when you feel your heart literally stop beating with the loss of your love.
People will take notice of this newly-adapted strength and be drawn to it, like a moth to a flame. Everyone begins to wonder what it is about you that gives you the confidence, Ora and ease. And that is exactly what it is, an ease. After entering a new era in life, enlightened, little will get to you because you already know you will be okay. This causes for a celebration; embrace any hardship or heartbreak in life. Let it temporarily hinder you and feel the pain because after the pain comes the new you. And this new you is worth waiting for.
The haunting epiphany always seems to arrive at every new era, however. This is the realization that as humans, we are designed to mate, both physically and chemically. At times, such as birthdays, where we evaluate our past moments and who has made it to our present, we often realize that we truly do seek love. As we begin to feel more at ease with ourselves, we feel more inclined to want to share that with someone. Most of us know what it is like to have a companion, a true partner in crime. To find someone whom you can chemically, emotionally and physically connect with is a difficult task and you will weed through a lot of people. It’s out there, however, and if you have already experienced this, then you know how powerful it can be and hopefully this person has not let you go, for it may never exist again in the same degree.
As we grow older, we realize that everyone is imperfect and we must first figure out what it is that we want and deserve before we can give someone else what they deserve as well. However, we all want an unyielding love. Life is not about success, materials or how many hardships we encounter. It’s about finding someone who can ride each wave with you along the way, because while we’re all fabulous, we are not designed to survive this mad world, all alone.
In the mean time, let the years pass. Let the heartbreaks embrace you and live through your heart. Because the tides will turn, the sun will rise again and you will always be okay.