There are four stages to dating: stage one, stage two stage three and stage four. Okay, it’s actually more complicated than this.
Stage one is characterized by blissful romance and lustful sex. It is this time that you are usually both on your best behavior, and you are both as happy as can be. In this stage you can truly believe that you want to spend the rest of your life with this person who can do no wrong. It is in this stage that impetuousness leads those who don’t know better or are lacking in the understanding of human behavior to marry before they actually know one another. This is more often a failing of youth, but there are adults who march down this past as well and end up… not so well.
Stage two is characterized by a comfortable state that is still pretty, pretty good. This may actually be the best stage in that you are now comfortable with each other which makes everything better. You are actually becoming friends as well as lovers. The goal is to never leave this stage. It is not an easy task but it has great rewards.
Stage three is characterized by complacency. It is at this stage that you are so comfortable with your mate that you forget all of the behaviors that made your relationship special. You have gone from being “one together” to being “yourself alone.” You tend to do what you want to do without considering your mate. While you never wanted to spend time apart in stages one and two, your other activities now take precedence.
Stage four is characterized by hostility and uncivil behaviors that ultimately lead to frustration, animosity and often-times dissolution of the relationship. Once you have entered this stage it is much more difficult to come back from the brink without great effort and compromise on the part of both parties. The problem is that by this time there are such incompatibilities that the no one wants to compromise and the relationship ends.
Quite often those who can keep dating stage two going will find that they want to move to the next part of stage two which may include either living together or getting married. If they can keep this up, they will have a wonderful life together as long as they don’t enter stage three – complacency. Unfortunately, complacency happens all too often and many marriages end up being just that: complacent.
There is only one way to stay in stage one and that means not seeing each other too often. Not too many people find this compatible because it is counter-intuitive when you are truly in love.