When some people get in a relationship they just hope for the best. But if you really want a rock solid relationship that is meant to last, you have to be intentional with making sure it works.
There are two keys to a solid relationship – communication and commitment.
Communication – You have to both be willing to communicate with each other openly and freely. But that communication is not just limited to the relationship. If you are to have a truly solid relationship, you should be able to communicate with your partner about any and everything – work issues, family issues, friendships, life goals, etc. You should never have a moment where you say to yourself, “Oh, I can’t talk to them about that”. Nothing should be off limits. And the conversation should be stimulating for the both of you. But in addition to communicating freely about life in general, you should be able to communicate freely about your relationship. You should be able to talk out any issues you are facing within the relationship. You should also be able to just check in with each other and talk about where you are, where you’ve been, and where you want to go as a couple. That’s the only way to be sure that you’re both on the same page… in the same chapter… in the same book… and in the same library!
Commitment – You have to have a commitment to each other in order to have a solid relationship. If you’re both just kind of doing whatever until whenever, then that does not a solid relationship make! If you both want a monogamous relationship, then you have to both be 100% committed to each other at all times. You’ve got to be in it together. You’ve got to know that no matter what happens, you are determined to make it work and work it out together. When two people are committed to each other, no outside sources can stop them. You’ve got to both be in it to win it. Commitment is not just about not cheating (although that’s a big part of it). It also means working together as a team and thinking and acting corporately. If you are committed to that individual you are in a relationship with, you think about them (and your joint future) with every decision you make.
There are hundreds of qualities that make a good relationship – love, patience, laughter, quality time, etc. – but these two are essential. There is no way a relationship can survive without these two. So be sure you’re in a relationship where you communicate openly and freely and where you are both fully committed to each other and the relationship as a whole.
What you said on FB:
AW: Communication is important because we were not given the gift of ESP. We cannot read one another’s minds, so we, in all of our relationships with other people, need to be able to have honest and open communication. Commitment is important to relationships because we need to be able to trust that the other person is in as much as we are. Commitment helps build trust….and without trust, you have absolutely nothing!
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